Greetings from the Oregon Coast. We are currently experiencing technical difficulties

Well, welley, wellerton. I am out at the Oregon coast with my family for the weekend and what do I find at the beach house my mom is renting? Cable and wireless internet that's what. What a world we live in my friends, what a world. So I am spending my morning not on the beach in the rain but watching every stupid rider bio piece Versus has put together with a little ticker banner at the bottom of the screen explaining that they are having technical difficulties and can't show the Tour. Why god why?

Moving on though, there are some interesting articles over at cyclingnews.com about the fallout from this year's catastrophic Tour drama. In particular I find the response from Kloden (or Klodie) insightful:

• "They seem funny to me," he started. "Vinokourov is supposed to have doped with someone else's blood. He knew that he would be controlled. That's like when someone sees a radar control in an 80 kmh zone and races through at 150 kmh. The same goes for Matthias Kessler. He had a testosterone value that had never before been measured so high. And that between two races which he was racing to win and had to reckon with controls. Nobody is that dumb."

• "Maybe I'll just quit entirely," he told German tabloid BILD. "I'm afraid that the sport is being criminalised, we could end up in prison. What happens if someone pours something illegal onto my salad? Suddenly I test positive and go to jail. I don't want that, I have a family. The whole thing doesn't make sense any more."

• Klöden's "adventurous" theory for the whole thing was a power fight between the UCI and the ASO for control of the Tour de France. "Intrigues are being woven, everyone wishes each other the worst," he said. "It has to do with a lot of money. What if someone is manipulating things in order to destroy it all and then take over the remains?"

Oh boy, those wacky Germans and their wacky conspiracies. I mean who heads up the UCI? The Illuminati? During a press conference UCI President Victor Von Doom had this to say:

I mean what's to worry about? I'll put up the official results later in the evening when everyone has gotten to watch it for themselves. In the meantime here are some funny things my brother showed me on this interweb thingy:

• Pictures of kitties with funny made up quotes? So awesome.

• "Once there was a gay boy who wished for a planet full of unicorns."

• This is so good I feel the need to embed the video in the page to make sure everyone watches it. This kid makes me believe the tooth fairy, jesus, and loves-a-lot bear all exist and gives me a warm feeling inside knowing that he is out there somewhere, honing his craft: