Garnett heads east.

-Psst...I stole this pic from Freedarko, don't tell anyone, ok?

So Boston has pried away the Big Ticket from Minnesota and it only cost them an arm and half a leg. The Associated Press is reporting on this "unofficial" story but it would appear it is all but a certainty KG will be in the Town of Beans next season. Coming to the Timberwolfies is a veritable smörgåsbord of players (keep in mind this is not an official list as it can change but will most likely include some assortment of these guys): forward Al Jefferson, guard Sebastian Telfair, swingman Gerald Green and center Theo Ratliff. Along with these players is most likely a future first round pick and a photograph from the future showing the grave Danny Ainge will be buried in if the Celtics fail to win a championship (it will disappear a la "Back to the Future" if they do win).

Tom Ziller over at the NBA Fanhouse makes a very interesting point about all this:

You know what else that would mean? Garnett, Pierce and Ray Allen would earn roughly $60 million in 2008-09, and about $64 million in 2009-10. Yes, the team will be close to the luxury tax for the next three seasons on just those three salaries. (Meanwhile, San Antonio's Big Three -- Duncan, Parker, and Manu -- will cost about $40 million a year during that stretch.) And if the purported trade scenario comes true -- most good young Celtics prospects and a handful of draft picks are due to Minnesota -- then the well for cheap but productive role players is bone dry. Even funding the midlevel every year would get too pricey with luxury tax considerations.

This all points to the fact that Boston is gonna need to win a championship soon or else heads will roll

Get all smart and stuff...

There is an interesting article in the New York Times from a few days ago that takes a look at the gambling shenanigans that have been rocking the NBA. Read up and tell me what the hell it all means.

Greetings from the Oregon Coast. We are currently experiencing technical difficulties

Well, welley, wellerton. I am out at the Oregon coast with my family for the weekend and what do I find at the beach house my mom is renting? Cable and wireless internet that's what. What a world we live in my friends, what a world. So I am spending my morning not on the beach in the rain but watching every stupid rider bio piece Versus has put together with a little ticker banner at the bottom of the screen explaining that they are having technical difficulties and can't show the Tour. Why god why?

Moving on though, there are some interesting articles over at cyclingnews.com about the fallout from this year's catastrophic Tour drama. In particular I find the response from Kloden (or Klodie) insightful:

• "They seem funny to me," he started. "Vinokourov is supposed to have doped with someone else's blood. He knew that he would be controlled. That's like when someone sees a radar control in an 80 kmh zone and races through at 150 kmh. The same goes for Matthias Kessler. He had a testosterone value that had never before been measured so high. And that between two races which he was racing to win and had to reckon with controls. Nobody is that dumb."

• "Maybe I'll just quit entirely," he told German tabloid BILD. "I'm afraid that the sport is being criminalised, we could end up in prison. What happens if someone pours something illegal onto my salad? Suddenly I test positive and go to jail. I don't want that, I have a family. The whole thing doesn't make sense any more."

• Klöden's "adventurous" theory for the whole thing was a power fight between the UCI and the ASO for control of the Tour de France. "Intrigues are being woven, everyone wishes each other the worst," he said. "It has to do with a lot of money. What if someone is manipulating things in order to destroy it all and then take over the remains?"

Oh boy, those wacky Germans and their wacky conspiracies. I mean who heads up the UCI? The Illuminati? During a press conference UCI President Victor Von Doom had this to say:

I mean what's to worry about? I'll put up the official results later in the evening when everyone has gotten to watch it for themselves. In the meantime here are some funny things my brother showed me on this interweb thingy:

• Pictures of kitties with funny made up quotes? So awesome.

• "Once there was a gay boy who wished for a planet full of unicorns."

• This is so good I feel the need to embed the video in the page to make sure everyone watches it. This kid makes me believe the tooth fairy, jesus, and loves-a-lot bear all exist and gives me a warm feeling inside knowing that he is out there somewhere, honing his craft:

The bell tolls for thee...

No man is an island,
Entire of itself.
Each is a piece of the continent,
A part of the main.
If a clod be washed away by the sea,
Europe is the less.
As well as if a promontory were.
As well as if a manner of thine own
Or of thine friend's were.
Each man's death diminishes me,
For I am involved in mankind.
Therefore, send not to know
For whom the bell tolls,
It tolls for thee.
-John Donne

Well, it has been a rather sad couple days over in France as it seems everyone has been asked to leave the Tour. Rasmussen, Moreni (and the entire Cofidis team), Vinokourov (and the entire Astana team): all kicked out or asked politelty to get the hell out.

So what's left? 143 riders are remaining and the outlook is dim for the future of the Tour much less for the sport. I have been so busy reading the scandals I haven't even been able to keep up with the freakin' new standings. I do know that Contador is leading the pack now and the entire peloton will be crying all the way into Paris as more and more sponsors run screaming the other way.

I am working hard at keeping the faith but with crooked refs and doped up cyclists I am having some trouble keeping up. Tomorrow I will collect myself and get some results and more info up. James has sequestered himself on the southeast side of town so there has been no Bigman Shoes conference (sitting at the bar till close rambling to each other) for awhile. Check back for more info and some lighter-hearted sort of posts. Posts that involve pictures of dudes like this:



P.S: My brother-in-law (or cunado en espanol) is totally awesome. (He forced me to put that. He is in fact very scary and will someone please call the police and send them to the Motel 6 on Stark and 91st to deal with him!)

Time for a little C-Murder update

To all my fans I apologize for not being a more active part of the blog lately. I have been busy dominating the bike polo world and since apparently my IPhone got accidentally shipped to Africa I am not able to post to the site using my current cell technology(as you can see below):


But let's face it, my fingers are far too fat to use that fancy Iphoneythingamajig anyway. So let's get cracking with some interesting news:

• Refs fixing games? Making questionable calls? somebody call Dick Tracy because if my hunch is correct "there's a whole lot of pudding to be found under this rock" (huh?). NBA referee Tim Donaghy is under investigation for helping the mob fix NBA games (like this one). I heard word that he is seeking Federal protection a la "Goodfellas" which makes me think he'll get a visit from a couple guys that look a bit like this sometime soon.
• Kobe is lighting up the USA Basketball mini-camp this past week. "Black Mamba" led his "blue" team to a win over the "white" team in an intersquad scrimmage and now must face the "red" team which I am pretty sure will be made up of the superhuman (no mutants!) team: The Avengers and will be officiated by refs painted green. Oh yeah Kobe, good luck guarding Moon Knight during a full moon.
• In case you haven't checked out the amazing site known as "The Wizznutzz" you should really get a move on it. I recommend starting here and then moving on to this. Basically the whole damn thing is unbelievable but these are some of my favorites.

So that's about it for me I guess. Just wanted to touch base and put up some dumb pictures and funny links. Get a move on with looking at it all cause there's a quiz on Thursday. Oh and here's one more pic to send you on your merry way.

Alpenrose Sixday Photos

Bigman Shoes will be enjoying Post Sixday Bloody Marys and watching the Tour today but here are some photos—we never claimed to be photographers by the way.

The whole gang

The podium

Mike Murray

Sasha Lacey leads the field

We accidentally got a photo of an actual exchange.

Candi Murray giving instructions or maybe just heckling the field.

Darien Curl

Dean made a DC15 will save and the rain came to an end.

Jerome Dumortier coming into the Madison

Brian Abers



B's Podium

Steven Beardsley

Mark Blackwelder

And the view you've all been waiting for.

Alpenrose Six Day Six

Race 1: Tempo
"A Chink in the Armor"

Bigman Shoes was not in attendance for this race thanks to the wonders of TriMet but our man in the field Zak filled us in (thanks Zak). There were some early moves involving Jimmy Lingwood and Tony Kic but things got exciting when Steven Beardsley fell off the lead group and then went straight through the field and off the back--the first sign of weakness Beardsley has shown all week. Mark Blackwelder was able to pick up most of the remaining points but the Gentle Lovers (who finished one and two in the Tempo) failed to capitalize on an opportunity to put Beardsley/Lingwood down a lap. With an hour long Madison coming up perhaps there was a chance to take back three laps.

There was a long rain delay and the middle event for the day was scratched.

Hour Madison

Perhaps detecting a slight hint of blood in the water Blackwelder came out all guns blazing.

With everything to gain and nothing to lose Kic/Blackwelder attacked Beardsley/Lingwood at every opportunity. In the end Beardsly/Lingwood rode like the champions that they are and lapped the field with more than 45 minutes left to race. By the halfway point they had lapped the field twice and by the race’s end threw in a third lap for good measure. Steven Beardsley and Jimmy Lingwood are the new Alpenrose Sixday National Champions. Kic/Blackwelder were 2nd overall with Drake/Boxberger taking the third step on the podium. Simmons/Hoefer and Dumortier/Lacey finished 5th and 6th respectively.

Things also stayed status quo in the B race.

1. Abers/Bjesse-Puffin
2. Murray/Curl
3. VanValkenburg/Charboneau
4. Fisk/Bihlmaier
5. Mauntner/Hughes-Godfrey

With women turning out in such large numbers this year there are rumors of a National Sixday Women’s Championship next year. Exciting Stuff.

(Pictures should follow shortly. Check back)